Champions #24

Rachel, aka Diamondback, and Mentallo are standing in the Champions new base of operations, an older house in a secluded area in Arizona.

"This place has been trashed." Mentallo observes as he moves around the room looking for clues.

"Duh! That's what I said on the phone. What happened here?" Diamondback moves some cushions to see if anything was dropped.

"What's this?" Mentallo stands up holding a torn piece of paper. The paper has the words: Plexico La

"Get the phonebook!" Rachel orders.

Mentallo picks up the phonebook.

Plexico Labs Inc., an animal testing center in Phoenix, Arizona.

"We have done it my simple minded lackey!" Dr. Plexico shouts.

"I'm not your lackey, doctor. I don't appreciate even being considered a lackey!" Dr. Bousquet responds.

"I wasn't talking to you partner. I was talking to....Him!" Dr. Plexico points to his feebleminded assistant.

"Uhm.. Uhm... Yes master... eh... eh... I love the new monkeys." Shelton stammers.

"They're not monkeys!! They're not monkeys!! You idiot!! They are chimpanzees!!" Dr. Plexico rants.

"Sorry master."

"Get us the new viral agent, Shelton." Dr. Bousquet says while looking over his latest test results.

A being is flying away from the Earth.

"I couldn't find my home on Earth. What is going on here? Where am I? There is only one place that I can think of that can give me the answers I seek."

The lone figure flies off into the deepest reaches of space.

Diamondback and Mentallo reach the outer gates of Plexico Labs Inc. The area does not seem to have very good security. Mentallo uses his abilities to attempt to locate other people.

"From what I can tell, there are no security guards but I do seem to be getting some strange results from within the lab. We must be careful." Mentallo then moves off to climb the fence.

Diamondback and Mentallo climb the fence and head for the building.

Shelton runs into the room and trips.

"Shelton! You moron! Didn't I tell you not to come in here?" Dr. Plexico yells while putting a strange liquid into a syringe.

"I don't remember.. uhm...uhm...I don't remember... What was I going to say? Oh yeah.. eh eh... There are two strangers approaching the back door. Maybe they have candy? Mmmmm..Candy.... Mmmmmmm... I will go check, yes?"

"No! You fool! It is probably a friend of theirs" Dr. Plexico points off panel.

"Dr. Plexico, this could provide a good test of the Chimpanzee Commandos." Dr. Bousquet starts to drool at the prospect.

Dr. Plexico's eyes roll back in his head from the excitement. "Ooooh! I like the way you think doctor. Let's do it! Release the Chimpinoids!"

"They're called the Chimpanzee Commandos!!"

"Chimpinoids!"

"Commandos!!"

"We will determine that later, first we must get rid of our uninvited guests." Dr. Bousquet says.

A giddy look crosses both their faces.

"Shelton, release our prized test subjects." Dr. Plexico laughs out loud.

"Mmmmm....Candy.... Rock Candy baby... Mmmmmm... Maybe a Twix bar or Hostess fruit pies.... Mmmmmm"

Dr. Plexico slaps Shelton.

"Oh! eh... eh.... Sorry master... I will release the Chimpinators... Then I will get some candy."

Dr. Plexico and Dr. Bousquet look at each other as Shelton leaves the room. Both mouth the word "Chimpinators, yuck."

Diamondback picks the lock to the backdoor.

"This has been too easy. How could they have gotten the Champions?"

"I am not sure Rachel ... maybe we're looking in the wrong spot?"

As Diamondback opens the door, three twenty foot chimpanzees come flying through the door!

"Intruders, you will stop where you are!!" A voice booms out the speaker near the backdoor. "Unless you have candy."

The Chimpanzees have surrounded Mentallo and Diamondback.

"We don't want to hurt you, but we must!" The first chimpanzee says.

"You can talk?" Mentallo gasps.

"Of course. Give up, or we will have to use our Banana Packs on you."

"I just want my friends back." Rachel reaches into the bag where she keeps her diamonds.

"That will be impossible. They are the next wave of experimentation." The second Chimpanzee starts to reach into his Banana Pack.

Diamondback throws a diamond at one of the first Chimpanzee. A huge explosion knocks everyone down.

"What the..!?" Rachel says. "I never had anything that could do that."

"Don't look a gifthorse in the mouth Rachel. Let's get these guys while two of them are stunned."

The third Chimpanzee rushes Mentallo. Mentallo steps to the side and trips the beast.

"Ouch! That hurt!" Mentallo screams.

"You think you got hurt! You tripped me you funny lookin' human!"

Mentallo jumps on the back of the beast and starts to punch it.

"Is this supposed to hurt?" The Chimpanzee starts to get up while Mentallo stays on his back.

"Yes." Mentallo says.

Meanwhile Diamondback is pulling another diamond from her bag.

"I hope this is my grapple diamond. Maybe I can get one of them out of the way while I try to figure out what to do with the other one."

She throws the diamond and an energy bond comes out that surrounds both of the chimpanzees.

Rachel thinks to herself "I didn't pay extra for these diamonds, why would they be upgraded like this?"

"Help me!!" Mentallo is being held above the head of the last chimpanzee, but not for long as he is thrown right into Diamondback.

"Now I, Bonzo Junior, shall destroy both of you with the Banana Seat."

"Get him Bonzo, Jr.! You got them bums now!" The two captured chimpanzees cheer.

Bonzo Jr. pulls a banana seat from his Banana Pack and hurls it at our two incapacitated heroes. Before the Banana Seat can strike, Diamondback rolls both her and Mentallo out of the way. The Banana Seat hits the ground with a thud.

"It doesn't do anything?" Mentallo gets up.

"Hey, it's a banana seat from an old bike. What did you think it was? Now I shall hurl the Banana Split at you."

Bonzo Jr. reaches in and pulls out his hand real quick.

"Darn it! It melted! It was mint chocolate chip too. Now I'm angry!"

"Now that's a setback" the first chimpanzee continues to try to get free.

Diamondback reaches back into her bag and hopes she doesn't get herself and Mentallo killed with the diamond she pulls out. She hurls it at Bonzo Jr.

Bonzo Jr. shrinks down to 2 feet tall. Mentallo kicks him in the head and the fight is over.

"Boo! Hiss! Boo! Hiss!" The other two chimpanzees scream as Bonzo Jr. goes down.

Our long running mystery guest reaches an area deep in space.

"There is nothing here. Nothing! How could this be? Where am I?"

"Now to start our experiments on the Champions!" Dr. Plexico gloats.

"Shouldn't we call them the Chimpions?" Dr. Bousquet suggests.

"Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!" Both doctors fall to the ground laughing.

Shelton walks into the room.

"Uhm.. heh... heh... I see this is a bad time... me come back later." Shelton then leaves the room. "Me no want to ruin good time... heh... heh...heh ... what a couple of Baloo-asses ... heh heh"

Mentallo and Diamondback are crawling through the air ducts to try to find their way to the Champions without being detected.

"Rachel, what if there are more of those things we fought?"

"How should I know? It doesn't matter, though, we're here to free my friends. And we're not leaving till we do."

"You know if our plan works, villains like this guy would be out of business." Mentallo continues to crawl behind Diamondback, but starts to smirk. Getting her to help them is going to be easier than he thought. Especially with her mind occupied he has been able to nudge her mind so that she is even more insecure than she was. At the same time he is increasing her feelings of trust towards him.

"I know and then Cap and I could be together. I will work with you, but only if the hero losses are minimal."

"We won't be hurting anyone Rachel." Mentallo says. While thinking to himself that this was easier than he could have imagined.

"There they are." Rachel whispers. "Oh my God. They've been turned into Chimpanzees. Even Cassie."

"Scott Lang's daughter?"

"How did you know that? Were you in my mind?"

"No, but your thoughts were so strong I couldn't keep them out." Mentallo thinks to himself that he almost ruined everything with that mistake, but the backlash in his mind from her sudden shock left him careless. He was lucky she didn't notice the pain on his face.

Seven chimpanzees are in a cage. One of the chimpanzees has three heads.

Rachel and Mentallo leap into the room from the ventilation shaft.

"You two are going down!" Rachel yells as she jumps to the floor.

"How did you two get in here?" Dr. Plexico screams.

"Yeah, and why weren't we warned?" Dr. Bousquet adds.

Shelton comes into the room.

"I'm sorry masters, but you were having such a good time that I didn't want to disturb you. Uhm... heh... eh... I also got... uhm... hungry for some candy." Chocolate is smeared all over Shelton's face.

"One of these days Shelton!" Dr. Plexico warns.

"Sorry Master."

The chimpanzees start to make loud noises.

"Well the one on the far left is Batroc." Diamondback says.

"How can you tell?" Mentallo asks.

"He is the chimp with the French accent."

"Shelton, release the Chimpions" Dr. Bousquet orders.

The Chimpanzees are released and immediately attack the two doctors.

"Yaaaaaaaah!" The two doctors scream in pain.

"Stop it guys. If we don't have them alive we can't turn you back to normal." Rachel cries.

The seven chimps stop their attack and move over to Diamondback and Mentallo.

"Stop groping me Batroc. Or I will make you stay a chimp."

The chimpanzee in the purple suit sheepishly moves towards Mentallo.

"Now give us the antidote." Diamondback demands.

"There is no antidote." Dr. Bousquet climbs to his feet.

"Why would we make an antidote?" Dr. Plexico adds while getting to his feet.

"But masters, the antidote is right over..."

"Shut up, Shelton!"

"Doesn't matter, losers. I already read your minds and I know that the antidote is over there." Mentallo walks over to a container with the words antidote on it.

"Curse you two. Our plan was infallible." Dr. Plexico rants.

"Yeah the world was ours!!" Dr. Bousquet is seething with anger.

"With an army of super powered Chimpanzees under our control we would have been unstoppable." Dr. Plexico's eyes light up at the prospect.

"No one could stop the Chimpanzee Commandos!!" Dr. Bousquet dreams of world conquest.

"They are the Chimpinoids!"

"Chimpanzee Commandos!"

"Chimpinoids!"

The two are still arguing when the police arrive.

"You dolt! The mere words Chimpanzee Commandos strike fear in the hearts of men!" Dr. Bousquet doesn't even seem to notice the cuffs or the policemen.

"Bah!! The name Chimpinoids would scare the gods themselves!" Dr. Plexico also seems oblivious to the police officers.

The Champions, Cassie Lang, Mentallo and Cerberus sit there watching in stunned silence while the two doctors are led away by police. Shelton meanwhile seems to have escaped.

A viewscreen at A.I.M. headquarters has Shelton's face on it.

"So they escaped did they?"

"Uhm... heh...eh... Yes they did Master." Shelton says.

"Stop thy silly games. Thou doth not need to keep up thy cover anymore." Ares stands in the middle of A.I.M.'s command center.

"Yes Master. I will... uhm...stop.... talking... uhm... heh.. eh... like this."

"Why does our best field agent have to be such an annoying pest. Thou shalt stop thy joke now! Or I shall make thee pay!"

"Sorry sir. I get carried away."

"One final question. Why did thou let them find the antidote instead of destroying it?"

"You ordered me to let them find it. Did you change your mind, oh mighty one?" Shelton asks.

The viewscreen goes blank.

"Damn that Mentallo!" Ares screams. "He caused him to think I wanted the Champions alive. I would have preferred to see them stay as Chimpanzees for my amusement. Well at least our field agent survived. Shelton Pone' is very important to my future plans even if he does annoy me."

Next Issue: The setup to the Avengers/Champions crossover begins. Diamondback betrays the Champions. Will the Champions survive? You're going to have to find out.